5 Comments

The Magic of Similac

Dear Similac,

Thank you for turning this emaciated waif


into this healthy chunker

 

Love,
The woman who pays $15 freaking dollars for a 12-ounce can

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, lately, my To-Do list has looked a lot like this:

Article summary
1 hour indexing for Melissa
Get dressed
Laundry

And it’s making me feel very unproductive. I’m considering redoing my lists to look more like this:

Feed Jared
Change diaper
Feed Rebekah
Change diaper
Eat breakfast
Article summary
Feed Jared
Change diaper
Feed Rebekah
Change diaper
1 hour indexing for Melissa
Go to the bathroom
Feed Jared
Change diaper
Feed Rebekah
Change diaper
Get dressed
Eat lunch
Feed Jared
Change diaper
Feed Rebekah
Change diaper
Make/eat dinner
Laundry
Feed Jared
Change diaper
Feed Rebekah
Change diaper
Blog

And that’s only covering 8 am to 8pm. That doesn’t even show you the other three feedings/diaper changes involved in my 24 hour cycle.

Yup. I feel better now.

Tomorrow night we’re getting a visit from Joe. We’re terribly excited. Except last night, as I was falling asleep, I realized with horror that we didn’t have anything good to feed him for dinner. So today, instead of taking a nap, I loaded up sleeping kids into the stroller and walked to Maceys. In lieu of a cart, I just packed groceries on top of the twins. I’m kicking myself now for not taking a picture on my cell phone, but picture, if you will, Jared buried under 2 cans of black beans, 2 bunches of cilantro, 2 red bell peppers, 2 bananas, 6 tomatoes, and a red onion. Rebekah got to share space with much less virtuous items, including cookies and cream cheese frosting (I’m thinking “sugar, spice, and everything nice,” right?). And now we’ll all get to enjoy this. Well, the adults will, anyway. Seems unfair that the kids held all those groceries and don’t get to enjoy the fruits of their labor. But they don’t have teeth. Such is life.

The poor bagger at the checkout counter didn’t quite understand me when I explained that I was going to stow the groceries in the basket under the stroller and walk home. She carried them to a cart and was all set to help me move them to the car I didn’t have. (And one of the baggers from another aisle came over and said that his cousin had quintuplets. I think he might have been lying. Those don’t exist.) (And if you’re ever looking for tortilla strips with which to top a salad, check the crouton aisle.)

Also: got a lovely visit from Tia today. She helped me feed and soothe babies, and sat on my couch and watched me chop vegetables and talked with me for a couple hours. I hope I get many more such visits in the future.

Fin.

 

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5 comments on “The Magic of Similac

  1. How can that possibly be my little Jared? What a cutie! Those cheeks just get bigger and bigger. And I greatly prefer the productivity of the second to-do list. Look how many things you get done in a day!

  2. This list is freaking hilarious!!!! I love the way you think. And, for the record, unless you’re walking to Macy’s that day, who really cares if you actually get dressed? And who is the tyrant making you summarize articles??

    And I can’t believe that’s JARED! Are you quite certain? Could there have been some sort of mistake?

    I typed this, and THEN read your mom’s response. (Alas, she is always faster at responding than me. I have resolved to become her someday. I’ll add that to MY first list.) At any rate, I thought it was pretty cool that she and I said almost the same thing. I’m going to try not reading her’s first again, and see if we continue to think alike, due to the one week mind-meld we had. Unless, of course, I become more precocious and respond FIRST.

    : )

  3. P.S. How does Rebekah feel about Jared being your #1 sport?? Maybe the cookies and frosting made up for it.

  4. Are you TRYING to make me jealous with that last paragraph?! Sheesh. I love you all.

  5. Hey Kim! I love reading your blog! SO jealous you had twins! I noticed that you feed the babies one after the other. Are you nursing or are you using formula? The mom that had the twins I watched, fed them at the same time in these sweet chairs she has and a bottle in each hand :)

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